It's just not possible to be any cuter!

The boys are getting their first vaccine AND they are being circumcised today. :( Poor things.

NICU halloween party

Quick update

Mom has been a little extra sad lately that the boys still aren't home. But, the good news is that they have been stepped down (again) to another nursery in the hospital, and they continue to thrive. Myles is up to 5 lbs (WOOHOO), and Madden is a little smaller (even though he's older) at 4 lbs 9 ounces. They are both gaining weight beautifully, but still struggling a little bit with their feedings. They just can't seem to get up the energy to take all of their feedings orally yet. The doctor reminded me (when I fell apart this morning), that we just happened to get to meet them early, but they would still be cooking in my oven so under the circumstances, they are doing extremely well. It's hard to keep that in mind when all I want is for them to come home. Every day I go in to the nicu, I hope they will tell me that they have taken all of their feedings by bottle, and it's time for them to go home. No such luck so far. Here are some pics from our visit today. We got to give them a bath for the first time, and it was so much fun!

UGH!!!!

I don't know how I'm surviving this time that the boys are in the NICU. It seems like it gets harder and harder with each visit. :( I know mother's everywhere have survived it, but how????

Peace

I'm so smitten

The boys are doing extremely well, but are still in the hospital. They are taking several bottles a day, but still need to be tube fed at times because they get exhausted and can't quite finish their bottles. The good news is that they have both latched on to the breast. It was amazing, and brought tears to my eyes. The doctor now wants me to put them to the breast twice a day. He is gradually increasing the amount of their feedings, and they are gaining weight nicely. Myles is now a tiny sumo wrestler at a whopping 4 lbs 11 ounces and 19 inches long. Madden is a tiny bit behind at 4 lbs 4 ounces and 18 inches long. They are changing every day, and it's harder and harder on mom and dad to leave them at the hospital. I had a little break down yesterday, but I guess that's to be expected. It's just agonizing not having them with us.

Two different birthdays and two totally different births...

All day Sunday 10-12-08 I had been leaking a little bit. I thought it was urine at first, but it was coming too often, so that afternoon (after several hours of this), I told the nurse just in case. They did a little test, and confirmed that I had ruptured. The doc came in and examined me and did an u/s. I was dilated to 5 and contracting every 2-3 minutes. She decided to send me to L&D to give birth. Once I got there, the contractions slowed down. She consulted with the MFM, and they made the decision to keep me in labor rather then trying to stop it. She ruptured the rest of the bag (big gush), and the contractions REALLY started coming. She encouraged me to go ahead and get the epidural because she thought things could change very quickly (this was about 9pm). I asked the nurse to call for the epi. About 30 mintues later I still didn't have one, and the pain was getting MUCH worse. The nurse finally came in and said she was sorry, but that the anesthesiologist (sp?) had gone into an emergency c-section, and it would be at least an hour before they could get to me. I wanted to PUNCH her and/or myself. I was in so much pain and had been crying and trying to breathe through them. I begged for anything, and she gave me something that just made me see double, but didn't take the pain away.
Over an hour later the guy comes in to give me the epi. I'm in so much at this point I can't even really sit up straight for him to do it because I could feel one of the babies getting ready to pop out. I felt so much pressure from a baby, that it was painful to sit on my bottom. They kept telling me to do certain things or turn a certain way but I literally couldn't. I could hardly breathe through it. The contractions felt like they were back to back with NO time in between, just constant pain (yes, I'm using the word pain A LOT). He gets the epidural in and tells me I should feel it start to work in a few minutes. They helped me lay back on the table, and all of a sudden my body started to involuntarily push (WEIRDEST FEELING EVER). The nurse was trying to get me to stop, but I couldn't. My body had taken over. She started rushing around yelling for help and for someone to call the doc. I kept telling her the baby was coming, and it seemed like nobody would listen (at first). As they were wheeling me down the hall I am screaming and my body is pushing. I kept telling them I could feel EVERYTHING. They said "are you sure you can feel this? Is your leg tingling yet?" I was like...I FEEL EVERY FREAKIN thing in my body right now.
We got to the OR and the doc said there was no time for a spinal, the baby was coming. I pushed about 4 times while screaming "I can't do this!!!!!!" On the 4th push, he flew right out screaming and crying. The best sound I've EVER heard (11:56pm)!!!
As soon as he came out, they gave me the spinal (PHEW). We tried to deliever Myles vaginally, but he went farther up in the uterus and wouldn't come back down. His heart rate dropped so I was quickly prepped for an emergency section. He came out screaming and crying at 12:52am. This is when eveyone realized they had different birthdays!!! The funny part is that I was so exhausted from the labor and birth of Madden, that I was actually snoring during part of the c-section. Who falls asleep during the birth of their child????

Madden was born at 11:56pm on Sunday, 10-12-08 vaginally and naturally weighing 3 pounds 15 ounces and he was 17 inches long. Myles was born on 10-13-08 at 12:52am via emergency c-section weighing 4 pounds 5 ounces and he was also 17 inches long.

The aboslute HARDEST part of the whole ordeal was having to leave them in the NICU on 10-17-08. My heart LITERALLY hurt as I was leaving the hospital. Much worse then the incision in my stomach or the stiches in my "hoo hoo." Since then it has gotten a tiny bit easier with each bit of good news that I get about their progress.

Myles started out on some oxygen, and was even on a ventilator for a few hours at one point. He is now breathing completely on his own with no assistance. They no longer get IV fluids. Just mom's milk and formula from time to time to supplement what I haven't been able to pump. They were both on photo therapy for a couple of days, but not any more! Oh, and they are out of the incubators and regulating their very own temperatures now. AND they have slowly started taking bottles. All of this within a week of their birth (which ended up being at 32w3d and 32w4d).

32 week update!

Today is a good day! I made it to 32 weeks and we had an ultrasound this morning. Nothing but good news, so our spirits are lifted. Madden is head down and weighs a little over 4 lbs and Myles has flipped and is also now head down (THANK GOODNESS) and he weighs about 4lbs 12 oz. They are in the 50th% and 65th% percentiles. Nice and healthy! I think they are trying to make things up to me (re: all the bed rest and time in the hospital) by both being head down so I can HOPEFULLY have a vaginal delivery. Now if I can get to 34 weeks, they will check to see if I have dilated anymore. If not, I may get to go home on bed rest. If I have, I'll be stuck in baby jail a little while longer. I have a feeling that if I make it that long, I will be in the hospital until they get here, but we'll see! Either way, I'm getting SO excited to meet them. I can't believe it's getting so close. WOW. Our lives are about to be turned upside down (in a good way). :)

On another note, Rod and I got to attend a class on the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit) on Tuesday. It was very informative, and we even had our name picked out of a drawing and we won a little gift bag with some samples. It was nice to get out of the room, and I even met my "neighbor" in room 254 (I'm in room 253). She is pregnant with a singleton, and she has been here for 9 weeks. Yes, I said nine. To start off the conversation, she said "So how long have you been in and what are you in for?" Right then I knew why they call it baby jail.

Anyway, she is going to be 33 weeks this weekend, so I'm keeping she and her baby in my thoughts that they make it to their goal as well.

My new goal is 34 weeks...3 weeks and 1 day away!

I see different docs almost every day, even though they're all from the practice where I go. They often say different (but similar) things about what they want to see happen with my pregnancy. It looks like there is a consensus that if I make it to 34 weeks and my cervix hasn't changed, then I may get to go home then! If I am dilated anymore, then I'm here until I deliver. I also get an ultrasound to check on the babies next week. Even though I don't know how I'll make it 3 more weeks in the hospital, I'm hoping and praying I'm here until then. I can't believe we're so close to the end!!